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5 Things Your Pastor Hates



Want to know the quickest way to become the most despised voice in your church? Do things that your senior pastor absolutely hates! Sure it’s easy to play the blame game and point fingers at your pastor but let’s be honest here, we all have our annoying quirks. If left unchecked, these quirks can leave a bad taste in the mouths of those around us and wreak havoc on our effectiveness in ministry. In children’s ministry you need more than a voice! You need a respected one if you’re going to make things happen! Start today by avoiding these 5 things pastors hate.

Number #1: A Leader who sees problems but not solutions

Are you the type of leader who’s constantly approaching your pastor about problems in your ministry area but have absolutely no suggestions on how to fix the problem? Now that’s a problem and trust me…Your Pastor HATES IT! When you observe a problem in your department, make it a practice to sit with your ministry team and wrestle through potential solutions. Talk to other children’s ministry leaders just like you who may be winning in a particular area you may be failing in. We’ve all been there before. Allow them to give you some pointers and create strong partnerships in the process. Seek out resources that could help lead you in the right direction. At the end of the day, don’t make your job the pastor’s job. Besides, they’ve got enough to do! That’s why they hired you!



Number #2: Leaders who lie

Are you a leader who exaggerates or embellishes? Listen, I don’t care who you think you’re fooling but lying will never make room for you at the table. The truth always comes to the surface one way or another. And if your pastor gets wind that you’re a leader who lies, their respect for you will go out of the window! Not only will it crush your credibility in leadership BIG TIME, the consequences in some cases, depending on the lie, can be catastrophic! So just be honest because you’ll never win by lying. Choose to be a leader who tells the truth even when it’s hard because when it comes to liars…Pastors Hate that!



Number #3: Leaders who play the blame game

If there’s one thing that Pastors hate, it’s leaders who are full of excuses and take absolutely no ownership for the shortcomings in the departments they’ve been entrusted to lead. Everything is always someone else’s fault!

  • “This didn’t work out because it’s the Parents' fault!”

  • “Well this didn’t work out because it’s the Workers' fault!”

  • Or my favorite…”No one wants to help me!”

Hey, if your response to failure is “If Only”…or ”You”…or “They” then you might be an active player in the blame game. I know it’s tempting but don’t do it! Your pastor HATES that game. Besides, the best leaders point the finger at one person, THEMSELVES, and they invest more of their energy in how they can lead better the next time instead of blaming others.



Number #4: Leaders who don’t want to change

A leader who won’t change won’t grow. Such stubbornness to change will kill not only a department but will halt a church’s ability to progress and move forward as a whole. This can prove extremely problematic for a pastor who struggles with confrontation. Leaders who don’t want to change can hold an entire department hostage because the pastor doesn’t know how to get rid of them. Don’t be the leader that keeps your pastor up at night because you’re unwilling to budge for the greater good. Pastors hate that! Be willing to change with the vision of the house or be willing to go!






Number #5: Leaders whose personal lives are a mess

Now of course, in life we all go through sticky situations but if you’re a leader that is ALWAYS and I mean ALWAYS having a personal problem, Trust me…You drive your pastor crazy! Especially if those problems are always preventing you from carrying out your responsibilities in ministry. Sure, your pastor may act empathetic at times but they are not pleased. Pastors love leaders who live their personal lives above reproach. Leaders who strive to keep their households NOT PERFECT, but in order and make the necessary investments to ensure that they are living wholistic lives so they may be equipped for every good work.



As a children’s ministry leader, it is vital that your pastor be your ally, not our enemy. So choose to steer clear of the things your pastor hates! I guarantee it will make your life much easier, or at least your ministry experience. So what’s something your pastor hates that isn’t on this list?

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